Anti Anti-Valentine’s Day

February 19th, 2015



Happy Valentine’s Day to my faithful “Goodness Gracious” readers!


Sorry. I know it’s super belated now, but I was too busy ranting about the standards of beauty last week to send my love and appreciation to my readers.


Plus, I wanted to see the latest V-day tweets and Instagram posts before tackling the holiday for my next column topic.


Note: If you have not yet read “365 days of love” by Alex Higl, our lovely editor-in-chief, go pick up last week’s issue and read it now. Not only is it very well-written and exactly on point, but it’s also an important precursor to my column this week.


In her column, Alex discussed how so many people forget to show love to others when they are not being reminded to do so.  It is true that Valentine’s Day definitely carries a certain obligation to express your love to others. But, in reality, that’s something we should be doing every single day of the year.


However, I’m not here this week to simply reiterate Alex’s ideas of love. Rather, I want to focus more on the actual holiday itself, which, for a large number of people, has become more dreaded than appreciated.


You see, there are actually two holidays that take place on February 14: Valentine’s Day and Anti-Valentine’s Day. All of the couples in the world spend the day and buckets of money on giving cute gifts and having romantic dates and all of that mushy stuff. These couples celebrate Valentine’s Day.


Then, there are the people who don’t have romantic partners. These people annually come together on this date to celebrate Anti-Valentine’s Day, or Singles’ Awareness Day, as some so affectionately call it.


It’s impossible to mistake who is celebrating which holiday. If you are active on social media or even pay attention to what the customer in front of you is buying at the grocery store, you can immediately identify the lovers and the desperately seeking. Hint: If the person is front of you is buying excessive quantities of alcohol, ice cream and anything with garlic or onions, it’s unlikely that he or she will be having a romantic night out.


The idea nowadays is that if you are not in a romantic relationship on Valentine’s Day, then you should spend your day gagging over the people who are.  Then, you spend your night literally binge eating and drinking until you are too bloated and/ or drunk to do anything but lay in bed and cry over your romantic misfortunes.


No wonder single people hate February so much.


However, I don’t remember ever reading any Valentine’s Day rulebook that says if you’re single, you are fated to spending the day in misery.


I do remember reading about the origin of Valentine’s Day. It was created in honor of St. Valentine, a man who shared his love with countless strangers simply for the sake of spreading joy in the world.


So, ladies and gents, this means that you’re supposed to celebrate all kinds of love on Valentine’s Day.


Therefore, being sour about your singleness kind of defeats the purpose  of Valentine’s Day.


I can fully empathize with the painfulness of being lonely. There’s this grand expectation that you are supposed to find that special someone by your mid-twenties, which can be panic-inducing for those who have never had a serious romantic relationship or recently went through a devastating break up.


That being said, there are countless other ways to experience and share love. The love that you share with your family and friends is often far greater and way more fulfilling than the so-called “love” that you may share with your boyfriend or girlfriend of a few months.


More importantly, the love you have for yourself should be reason enough to celebrate. I’m not talking about narcissism, but rather true appreciation for yourself and all of your wonderful qualities.


So, when Valentine’s Day rolls around again in 360 days, don’t fret if you don’t have a special someone to share it with. Instead of drinking a full bottle of wine in sorrow, drink it in celebration of your presently fulfilling relationships. Drink it in celebration of yourself.