An ode to the partner in crime

February 24th, 2011

What would Abbott be without Costello, Hall without Oates, Puffy without Ma$e? They might still be successful on their own, but why take that risk?

Everybody needs a sidekick. Not necessarily a Robin to their Batman, because those kinds of hierarchies can lead to internal conflict. Maybe something more along the lines of a Batman to their Superman, a Joker to their Lex Luther. In short, a partner in crime. Acronymically, a PIC (I didn’t come up with the acronym though).

There’s a reason they say two heads are better than one, and this is what they were talking about. The PIC is like a wingman for life (because, as Lil Wayne taught us, life is a beach). The PIC is the person you can rely on, who thinks on the same level as you. You don’t have to be able to finish each other’s sentences, but it helps.

PICs are like shoes, without them your socks would get really dirty and your feet would be sore. OK, maybe not the best analogy, but what I mean is different situations call for different PICs. How else do you think Will.I.Am decides which of the other two guys in the Black Eyed Peas is allowed to rap on a given song?

For social situations you want a PIC who’s good at initiating conversations, isn’t afraid to buy a round of drinks and hopefully slightly less good looking than yourself.

Studying requires a special type of PIC. Someone capable of distracting you right before you lose your sanity from going over formulas for three hours straight, but who can also pull you away from YouTube and Facebook when you have 10 minutes until your assignment is due. It’s preferable to share classes with your PIC, but not necessary. You can even take different foreign languages and still work it out.

The PIC ties in with a little life philosophy I refer to as DIFTS, which stands for “do it for the story.” And yes, I stole that acronym too.

Life is full of opportunities, and you need to pick and choose which ones to pursue. If you see a job opening at your favorite company then obviously you go after that, but others are tougher to decide. For those brainbusters, employ the DIFTS philosophy and it should help steer you in the right direction.

Your grandkids will thank you for it, and when it comes down to it, that’s the standard by which all things should be decided.

That being said, PICs aren’t a 24/7/365 sort of thing. Ben Franklin preached moderation and held these truths to be self-evident. There’s a reason he’s on the $100 bill, and that reason is he was a smart dude. It’s true that you can have too much of a good thing, and that you only need 13 virtues to get your face on U.S. currency.

It’s important to be an individual in life. I think a strong sense of self is necessary to reach your potential. If you can’t be successful without your PIC then when it’s the MOT (moment of truth) you might be SOL (I can’t print what that stands for, but you should be able to figure it out).

But even the strongest of us can’t do it alone.

You’d probably feel pretty silly going by yourself to see the Justin Bieber movie in 3D, but if you go with your PIC then it’s completely normal. Trust me, I speak from experience.